GHA

GRAND HEROIC AUTO
Take this, Jack Thompson: Video games can make us heroes! When her family's car flipped over, 11-year-old Audrey Plique helped get her parents and siblings out of the wreckage because -- get this -- she said she remembered from "Grand Theft Auto" that cars can blow up, which is dangerous. Never mind what she's doing playing "GTA" before she's gone through puberty, someone commend this incredible hero, this bad-ass of good deeds! And hey, maybe "Grand Theft Auto" is not good or bad -- it's just the center of the universe and teaches us everything, all that is possible. For this, oh godly creators at Rockstar, we thank thee for thy verisimilitude.